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A.J. is graduating! But a crazed PTA president is turning second-grade graduation into a huge affair complete with fireworks and skywriting.

New third grade teacher Mr. Granite has so many strange ideas about how to make Ella Mentary School environmentally friendly that the students are sure he must be an alien.

A.J. believes his new peewee football coach is crazy after she demands the team does push-ups in the mud and tells them to lift up a car, but when she wants to put girls on the team, A.

When the new vice principal is put in charge of Ella Mentry School for a few days, she tries out some very unusual ideas about how students learn.

When peanut butter and jelly sandwiches start disappearing from the vomitorium, the security guard of Ella Mentry School, Officer Spence, starts behaving strangely and arresting everybody he sees.

Ella Mentry School counselor Dr. Brad believes wisecracking A.J. may be a genius and subjects him to some very weird tests to find out for sure.

A.J. and his friends are forced to take classes even during recess, but their teacher, Mrs.

Mr. Granite is assigned a new student teacher but A.J. and his friends become convinced that she is actually a vampire who lives in a cave and plays in a heavy metal band with her zombie boyfriend.

A.J.'s mom gets a job, which means he has to spend his afternoons at After School Kids Kare--ASKK--where the program's director, Mr.

A.J. has to go see Miss Laney, the speech teacher, which makes no sense at all because he already knows how to talk.

When Ella Mentry School is threatened with closure due to budget cuts, A.